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Dagger Prince
Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Posts: 2918 Location: BC Canada
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Posted: Sun May 21, 2006 8:49 am Post subject: |
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Shall we send the Canadian beaver attack squadron? |
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Michelle Moistened Bint
Joined: 28 Oct 2004 Posts: 10232 Location: At my desk
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AironJedi Baron
Joined: 25 Jun 2006 Posts: 193 Location: Third rock from sun
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 12:32 am Post subject: |
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Hmm Why dose everything have to hinge on one theory???
how bout an asteroid hit about the same time as a climate change a massive viral plague along with Very hungry (but sleepy) dinosaurs....and an alien race said hmmm those hamsters with opposable thumbs look promising... lets just finnish the job.....
Last edited by AironJedi on Mon Jun 26, 2006 12:42 am; edited 1 time in total |
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A Shrubbery Prince
Joined: 24 Jun 2004 Posts: 1861 Location: Pacific NW
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 12:36 am Post subject: |
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I'd support your theory except for one glaring flaw. It includes not one single time-traveling drag queen.
Obviously bad science. You should be ashamed. _________________ A Shrubbery for Prez. Let's put more bushes in the whitehouse.
KWSN - A Shrubbery
Shrubbing since 2000 for the KaNI!ghts. |
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AironJedi Baron
Joined: 25 Jun 2006 Posts: 193 Location: Third rock from sun
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Posted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 12:39 am Post subject: |
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sorry im a sadist it would be a queen in leatehr and ready to be strapped.. shame on you thinkin i would like drag |
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Grizzly Prince
Joined: 01 Jun 2002 Posts: 3136 Location: Creepy (Crawlley)
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Posted: Thu Jul 27, 2006 3:48 am Post subject: |
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Right , due to an unpressented(*) demands (2) - here is a further installment.
Party nine.
"CLANG" was indeed the last word in part eight , and there I was in a cell (in my slippers natch') , but minus the piece of string that help my spectacles on . The Rozzers (coppers) had confisticated this (along with my pipe , tobacco , lighter , penknife , watch , apple and string etc).beliving DaGrizz would use it to hang himself in his despair .
Daft Buggers , upon removing my specs (and expecting them to fall arround my neck - restrained by the string you see) they fell to the floor and smashed.
I now had broken glass to wreak mayhem upon ANYTHING I chosey .
Instant panic from the "authorites"(*) , and I was restrained (told to sit on bed and be quiet) whilst they used their wepon of mass restruction (dustpan and brush) to remove my ultimate threat . With despair Grizz told them that Humpty Dumpty was my visionary friend!! But they did not "see" the joke .
Grizz (at ~ 04:00 Hrs) was now booored(*) , and using the provided "Bell" in the cell , sumoned the duty sergent to provide me with something to read .
He declined with his own urban patois(*) and dialect - but after I reminded him that I had not even been provided with the (written) terms of my present "lefts" to read , he departed and returned with the yellow official information sheets and a local free newspaper for my perusal .
Three minuets(*) later (I am a fast reader - notwithstanding that there was only 3 colum inches of "news" in the local paper - but 17.908 colum inches of ads and football) Da-Grizz pushes the "bell" again .
This time I was provided with the coppers own 'paper (The Sun) , but I told him I had allready read the football , may I have a larged than tabloid NEWS paper please .
I also informed him that I wished to speak to the delegated police solicitor . He informed me that it was past four in the morning and he was NOT going to telephone the solicitor at that TIME!!
Heh-Heh - I replied that "they" had arrested me at three o'clock and then showed him the yellow sheet he had given me before .
I spoke to the solicitor 10 mins later and he explained that I had been arrested on "Suspision on Burgl'ry" .
HUH ?
Well you see , you were in somones(') house without their permission - but I will see you in person in about 6 hours to advise you properly , click .
At ~ 07:00 hrs (no watch) The area Chief Inspector arrives and comes to see me .(Lets call him Kimberly)
Before I can do anything else apart from greeting him with outstretched hand (wich he shook) , he informed my that a copy of the Times (non Tabloid Daily paper) had been sent out for and would I like a smoke?
Breakfast was "interesting" - trying to eat "issue" fried eggs and fried bread with plastic (they obviously still thought that Grizz was a Suicidal case!) diggers (knife and fork/spoon) requires skill - I had that skill - fingers are great ! (Works on airlines also !!)
Anyhows , when the solicitor arrived , we retired to a private room and I presented my explaination of yesterdays events
Amist "Giggles" I was released at 11:00 hrs and given my pipe , tobacco, lighter etc back .
Stuffing my pipe withh Tobacco and then placing it in my mouth , I was greeted with the OUTRAGED cry "Oi - no smoking in here !!"
Since Da-Grizz had had no chance of lighting his pipe , I replyed(*) that I was not indeed smoking . "Then why have you got a pipe in yer mouth?" I pointed to a seated "yoof" in the room and said "He is wearing trainers (running shoes) , but he is not running!! Again a joke was not understood .
As you may understand Grizz was not best pleased at the heavy handed approach to a quite simple case of "Hose Abuse" - and when released enquired as to when his lift home would arrive .
I was informed that I had to walk .
"In my slippers?" DA-Drizz politly asked .
"Yes" they said .
"Hmmm - you gave me a lift here last night" Fearless Grizz said .
Amist approving and roaring laughter from the "visitors" at the cop-shop , Grizz shrugged and started to walk home (~4 miles)
To be conntinued......................
PS No numbered points here - Grixzzly has reached him numeric experteese
Best regds Grizzly _________________ Oh Bugger Forgot again - or is it Oh Father Reboot again ?
Ps Grizz in his second childhood - but not his last !
Edihtor of the KoKC (excused spel;l checher'er)
AND NI !!! Tophat 10e
[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/grizzly_counter.php[/[url=http://www.katrinashome.com/] ][/url] |
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Fart in your gen direxion I am the goatse.cx guy
Joined: 24 May 2002 Posts: 2022 Location: Regrettably for you, I'm Upwind in Upstate N.Y.
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Posted: Thu Jul 27, 2006 7:41 am Post subject: |
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Dagger wrote: | Shall we send the Canadian beaver attack squadron? |
Our squadron is somewhat depleted .
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A Shrubbery Prince
Joined: 24 Jun 2004 Posts: 1861 Location: Pacific NW
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Posted: Thu Jul 27, 2006 9:35 pm Post subject: |
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Ah, that's why Dagger hasn't been posting as of late.
And glad to hear the next installment Sir G, a riot as always. _________________ A Shrubbery for Prez. Let's put more bushes in the whitehouse.
KWSN - A Shrubbery
Shrubbing since 2000 for the KaNI!ghts. |
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Fart in your gen direxion I am the goatse.cx guy
Joined: 24 May 2002 Posts: 2022 Location: Regrettably for you, I'm Upwind in Upstate N.Y.
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Posted: Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:14 pm Post subject: |
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Grizzly wrote: | ........... quite simple case of "Hose Abuse" |
I can relate to that, sometimes the next day I can hardly walk .
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Grizzly Prince
Joined: 01 Jun 2002 Posts: 3136 Location: Creepy (Crawlley)
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Posted: Fri Jul 28, 2006 3:36 pm Post subject: |
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Fart in your gen direxion wrote: | Grizzly wrote: | ........... quite simple case of "Hose Abuse" |
I can relate to that, sometimes the next day I can hardly walk .
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Rissen O'Farty , Thats Pose - NOT Hose - POISE Ok !!
Jeeshesh
Regds Grizz _________________ Oh Bugger Forgot again - or is it Oh Father Reboot again ?
Ps Grizz in his second childhood - but not his last !
Edihtor of the KoKC (excused spel;l checher'er)
AND NI !!! Tophat 10e
[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/grizzly_counter.php[/[url=http://www.katrinashome.com/] ][/url] |
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Michelle Moistened Bint
Joined: 28 Oct 2004 Posts: 10232 Location: At my desk
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Posted: Sat Jul 29, 2006 10:41 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks for the instalment, Griz! It was so ! I reckon those coppers had never met anyone quite like you before. Have you got any more for us?
Not much more in my NFH saga here, other than the fact that nearly every window in the house is broken now. Not my house, their house. One kid was yelling at the top of his voice the other day that he would smash four more windows if his mother didn't give him a cigarette. Then he counted down from ten and .....smash, smash, smash, smash. When their bin gets emptied every week, all you can hear is glass going into the truck. And if they're not threatening to 'smash another window', they're threatening to 'put another hole in the wall'. *shakes head* They've been coming over the fence into our yard at night too. It's not hard to see where. The fence wire is bent down towards our side in a couple of places, so it's quite obvious. They've been away since Friday afternoon, so we've taken the opportunity to put some really spiky plants there. I can't wait to hear a "Yowch!" as they come over in the dark and step on them. _________________ My brain hurts.
Jammy's Brain Donor.
[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/KWSN_Michelle_counter.php[/img] |
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Warhawk Baron
Joined: 16 May 2006 Posts: 169 Location: East of Eden
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Posted: Sat Jul 29, 2006 10:54 pm Post subject: |
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In order to determine the proper level of moronliness, I have located an appropriate test:
http://www.crimsonskye.com/moron.html
I scored -3... My card certifying me as a moron is in the mail... _________________
It's easier to beg for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission. |
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Al Dente Prince
Joined: 23 Feb 2006 Posts: 3228 Location: Leodis, the jewel at the end of the yellow brick road (or M1)
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Posted: Tue Aug 01, 2006 6:09 am Post subject: |
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Damn, only dim-witted.
I really must try harder and keep taking the tablets (all 3 of them). _________________ Creationists believe they never evolved; I agree with them.
. . My Milestones . . My Full BOINC list |
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A Shrubbery Prince
Joined: 24 Jun 2004 Posts: 1861 Location: Pacific NW
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Posted: Tue Aug 01, 2006 10:31 pm Post subject: |
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I just managed to pull of slow, idiot was a strong runner up. _________________ A Shrubbery for Prez. Let's put more bushes in the whitehouse.
KWSN - A Shrubbery
Shrubbing since 2000 for the KaNI!ghts. |
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jbyram2 Prince
Joined: 23 Jun 2004 Posts: 7129 Location: NMoP EpISdn
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Posted: Thu Aug 03, 2006 11:01 am Post subject: |
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Above avarage.... I fell for the one about Moses...AGAIN!
BTW, a man CAN marry his widows sister, if he marries her before he marries his widow. _________________ 0.0 Giggly hertzes Folding!
Go Diskless..Pure computing elegance, no frills
The brain I'm wearing makes me eat chocolate and cry!!
Something Completely different |
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Atomic Booty Prince
Joined: 10 Sep 2005 Posts: 589 Location: New Orleans
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Posted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 5:17 pm Post subject: |
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Grizzly Prince
Joined: 01 Jun 2002 Posts: 3136 Location: Creepy (Crawlley)
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 6:35 am Post subject: |
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Way tooo long before another instalment, so , here goes
Part umpteen .
Grizz walks home , (in his slippers ) happily smoking his pipe and generally enjoying his freedom from his incarceration and issue government food .
It is around 13:00 hrs that I arrive at my front door .
Alas no keys , just me necessary stuffs in my pockets that the coppers in their wisdom had returned to me on my release .
Fortunately , WROTH , when I knocked on her door had a spare set , but I was SET upon for a précis of the nights (after 03:00 hrs ) doings . She explained that her phone had been going ballistic ALL night and FIZZ now had a shorter Fuse and I had better watch out !!
FIZZ was at work by now and was scathing when I telephoned 15 mins latter to inform her that I was at home and going to bed coz I was tired .
I went to bed coz I was tired .
INTERIM
Some time latter (I think maybe 3~4 days – a Sunday anyway ) another knock on the door , and a DC Chappy presents himself (lets call him Mr Plainclothes with a smile) . He explained that he wanted to speak to Fizz and was here to get the facts , and nothing but the facts Sir/Mam ..
Naturally I invited him in and introduced him to Fizz in the conservatory , where she was sewing . I excused myself and went to play with my soggy computers and try to resurrect some more of them .
There was a telephone call from Fizz’s boss (the MD) (On a Sunday?), and could he speak to her ASAP ? I interrupted the conversation between Fizz and DC Plainclothes (and a foolscap(*) nearly full pad (he had spoken to the other neighbours by then )) with the telephone (mobile) handset and made my way out . I was called back by Mr Plainclothes and informed that there was no reason leave as he had all of the information that he required , and could I go down to the station now to clear this incident up ?
Umm – do I get a lift back , or do I need to pack a dressing gown ? I enquired
Big GRIN from PC smiley ((obvious he had read the “case” notes ) and said yes ,lift back – no dressing gown or slippers) in the front of my car (unmarked) but I was not push the WAH-WAH button , as he had been advised by Fizz that I might do so (out of fun of course).
On the way in we “chatted” , and he enquired as to the “lost” Anti-Tank” missile that Grizz had alluded to . I said I could not talk about that , but would he like to hear about the Grizz involvement in the (students) revolution in Venezuela ?
To his credit he controlled his laughter and only said “You Chris , MAY push the WAH-WAH button anytime you want !!
We had a good laugh ( I wonder how much he knew ?)
To enormous grins and bon-hommie from the Desk Sergent (same one as on my arrest) Da-Griz was exonerated and given a lift home
(No I did not push the WAH-WAH button )
To be continued
Regds Grizz _________________ Oh Bugger Forgot again - or is it Oh Father Reboot again ?
Ps Grizz in his second childhood - but not his last !
Edihtor of the KoKC (excused spel;l checher'er)
AND NI !!! Tophat 10e
[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/grizzly_counter.php[/[url=http://www.katrinashome.com/] ][/url] |
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Grizzly Prince
Joined: 01 Jun 2002 Posts: 3136 Location: Creepy (Crawlley)
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 7:48 am Post subject: |
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Dagger wrote: | Shall we send the Canadian beaver attack squadron? |
You know where they are need'ed !!
Rgds Grizz _________________ Oh Bugger Forgot again - or is it Oh Father Reboot again ?
Ps Grizz in his second childhood - but not his last !
Edihtor of the KoKC (excused spel;l checher'er)
AND NI !!! Tophat 10e
[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/grizzly_counter.php[/[url=http://www.katrinashome.com/] ][/url] |
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Sir Hamster of Elderberry KWSN ArchBishop
Joined: 20 May 2002 Posts: 5117 Location: Beer City, Cheese Quadrant
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 12:54 pm Post subject: |
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Grizzly wrote: | Way tooo long before another instalment, so , here goes
Part umpteen .
...
(No I did not push the WAH-WAH button )
To be continued
Regds Grizz |
Please don't make us wait another year! |
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Grizzly Prince
Joined: 01 Jun 2002 Posts: 3136 Location: Creepy (Crawlley)
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 1:00 pm Post subject: |
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Sir Hamster of Elderberry wrote: | Grizzly wrote: | Way tooo long before another instalment, so , here goes
Part umpteen .
...
(No I did not push the WAH-WAH button )
To be continued
Regds Grizz |
Please don't make us wait another year! |
Sorry My attn span was taken from O'Farty's vo'cabblary , and he said " Is there no end to this ?"
Regds Grizz _________________ Oh Bugger Forgot again - or is it Oh Father Reboot again ?
Ps Grizz in his second childhood - but not his last !
Edihtor of the KoKC (excused spel;l checher'er)
AND NI !!! Tophat 10e
[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/grizzly_counter.php[/[url=http://www.katrinashome.com/] ][/url] |
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