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A New View of The Disappearance of Dinosaurs
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alpha_fruit
Prince
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Joined: 16 May 2005
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Location: Western North Carolina, USA

PostPosted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 11:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Michelle, doesn't deserve all this foul mouth mess, she is a great Mom and has 2 wonderful children. Glad they are big enough for all that crap not to rub off.

Come on over Michelle, there's room for all of you. Cool
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Grizzly
Prince
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Location: Creepy (Crawlley)

PostPosted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 2:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Neighbour from Hell.

Part one.

Grizz gotta hose pipe (STOP right now what you were thinking) – well I had a hose pipe- well I “borrowed” it anyway from a neighboor-but haven’t got it now coz the constables confisticated it. Anyways, good pipe this was, and with the pressure from a GOOD stand pipe, was used by the NFH to “shoot” pussy cats what had allegedly been trained to defecate on her lawn. Not true, I had trained them to stare her down..

Part two.

One day, in an experience long ago, Grizz and Kat (experienced KWSN’er’s will know of Kat) were using a power wash machine to clean the roof of our conservatory. Some “spay”(*) was in evidence, but we had checked (honest) that no washing was out on lines to be wetted. Etc.
The affore said (part one) hose pipe (owned by the NFH) was used to knock me off of my ladder and soak Kat. Bad move, Kat, is-(well-enough said), but qualifyised in unusual combat. Viz, the dropped power spray was presented to NFH (lets call her Hazel) , pointed end first, trigger end last.- and TOLD “Who has the most powerful weapon Hazel?” The Hazel from hell backed off and a wise move this was to all concerned..
We will not get into the pacification of Kat (WET) here by other sympathetic neighbours and myself.


Part three.

The NFH did take (revenge is not the correct word here, because she was not the aggrieved party) further action a week later . This involved using this blasted hose pipe to “bounce” water from her garden (did I say this was a good pressure pipe?) over the 6 foot fence,20 feet away, pointed at my upstairs study/office window open at ~ 45 ° and onto my computers. I was not in the study/office at the time. Alas the computers were.
Good job Grizz had an electricary cutoff thingy device working, or there would have been a fire.
There was a fire later when I came back to the house to see water cascading through the floor from upstairs, from my study/office.


Part four

To be continued----------------------



Regds Grizz


Ps this story is actually true and involves the loss of an anti-tank missile somewhere near the Soviet border
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Ps Grizz in his second childhood - but not his last !

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Michelle
Moistened Bint
Prince


Joined: 28 Oct 2004
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Location: At my desk

PostPosted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 6:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Grizz wrote:
The affore said (part one) hose pipe (owned by the NFH) was used to knock me off of my ladder and soak Kat. Bad move, Kat, is-(well-enough said), but qualifyised in unusual combat. Viz, the dropped power spray was presented to NFH (lets call her Hazel) , pointed end first, trigger end last.- and TOLD “Who has the most powerful weapon Hazel?” The Hazel from hell backed off and a wise move this was to all concerned..


Well done, Kat!! #ni-1
The NFH hosed your computers!!?? That's just plain disgusting. Did you get the NFH to replace them?

Farty wrote:
Michelle wrote:

.........I went up the side of the house and called the neighbour out and gave her a serve.



To resolve conflict in Oz you challenge the neighbor to a game of tennis Confused ? Isn't that quaint. No wonder Aussies are so good at the game. They bicker and then before you know it, they're out there playing 5 sets in the noon day sun

Rolling Eyes Called the neighbour out and told her what I thought? Razz Laughing

My kids aren't perfect. They scream at each other and throw things and carry on like jackasses at times. I've been known to yell at them at to stop their fighting. A few choice words have been tossed around...but not every waking moment. Not all day up until late at night. *shakes head*

The neighbours are awfully quiet today. Maybe I really did scare them! Shocked
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wraithe40
Baron
Baron


Joined: 20 Mar 2006
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Location: Western Australia

PostPosted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 9:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well done michelle...
they probably didnt expect you to stand up to them...

I had a simular prob yrs ago when my friends where younger and wilder...
The boys wear patches and a couple(2 actually) hopped over back fence and went thru neighbours house while they where having a party...
hmmm funny thing is they ran out of grog straight away...
but the boys went home and had a big party..free grog and all...
never heard a peep out of them again and the kids stopped destroying the roof of the garden shed...
some people just need to be scared straight....
Those guys i know have friends FNQ if u need michelle...
not all r born agains yet...
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Sir Hamster of Elderberry
KWSN ArchBishop
KWSN ArchBishop


Joined: 20 May 2002
Posts: 5117
Location: Beer City, Cheese Quadrant

PostPosted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 9:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Michelle wrote:
...
The neighbours are awfully quiet today. Maybe I really did scare them! Shocked


Well you sure scared me!!! Shocked My stubby throwing days are OVER!!!

Wink ni! i!u Wink
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Mr. Snrub
Prince
Prince


Joined: 20 May 2003
Posts: 1916
Location: Someplace far away...yes, that'll do.

PostPosted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 9:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Er...wait...so...Michelle scared the dinosaurs and they ran away...??? Yes, now I've got it.
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Michelle
Moistened Bint
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 4:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes, yes, very scary.

Especially when in need of coffee.

Confused

Razz
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Sir Hamster of Elderberry
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Joined: 20 May 2002
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 5:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Michelle wrote:
Yes, yes, very scary.

Especially when in need of coffee.

Confused

Razz


Dear Michelle;

http://www.thom.org/gallery/records/IASTcoffeepot/

Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

ni! i!u
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Michelle
Moistened Bint
Prince


Joined: 28 Oct 2004
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 7:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote



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BmfCb
Prince
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Joined: 26 Jun 2005
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 1:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The doctor told me to cut down on the coffee. Keep it below one can per day.

I can live with that Cool Laughing
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Sir Hamster of Elderberry
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 2:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

BmfCb wrote:
The doctor told me to cut down on the coffee. Keep it below one can per day.

I can live with that Cool Laughing


Yes. One can per day seems like it ought to be enough.



Shocked Shocked Shocked Wink ni! i!u
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KWSN_hgs
Prince
Prince


Joined: 01 Mar 2004
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Location: location, location.

PostPosted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 4:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

wow.

And I though having a neighbor who comes into my yard to rake up the leaves from his tree was bad...

(the leaves get there because the tree is really high and maybe because we don't have a fence)
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Michelle
Moistened Bint
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 10:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

lol Isn't it better that he comes in and rakes them up instead of leaving them for you to do?

#ni-1
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A Shrubbery
Prince
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 29, 2006 1:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I did ok with the neighbors. One doesn't talk to me at all, the other overhauled my lawnmower last weekend.
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Grizzly
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PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 7:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ok. Part Two (errm 5,edit)(overwhelped by the response you see)

Grizz, being upset to see water coming through the ceiling, (onto KATTS food trenchers I might add), when the front door opened. This was the voice of reason fortunately , having discerned that the cries of rage coming from the soggy downstairs room may portend EVENTS!!
Notwithstanding the (reasonable) question as “WHAT TF IS GOING ON?” , Grixz “Lost” it and went ballistic.
We have a 6 foot fence separating the Hazel property and ours. This fence has Spikes on top of it to “Keep our cats from clapping(*) on HER lawn”.
Grizz also has a hose pipe-alas-not of the same calibre as W Hazel.
So – Grizz grabs our hose pipe and LEAPS the fence.
NOW I’ll getcha WH!!
Forgot to turn on the tap did I not.
Unloaded hose.

Umm.

Whats this? THE NFH hose pipe (dripping-smoking) on the ground outside her rear door.

Ahh Haa. “Drink this Hazel!!”
How do you turn this thing on? Pull trigger? KERPOW!!!
She has unfortunately taken the confused several seconds to “Run Away” – through her house., leaving Grizz with no discernable Target. (Except an OPEN door) Twisted Evil

Found one(or two)
TV, MicroWave,Carpet,Oven(opened),BED-you get the idea.

Since adrenaline was now exhausted, I could not “leap” or indeed climb the fence back home, so exited via her front door, holding a “Smoking hose”

The Voice of “reason” was there. With some others.

“DROP That Hose”. I was told Embarassed




To be Continued:

Regds Grizz

PS- This true story does contain a “missing AT Missile-and Venezuelan fella named Chav*z
_________________
Oh Bugger Forgot again - or is it Oh Father Reboot again ?

Ps Grizz in his second childhood - but not his last !

Edihtor of the KoKC (excused spel;l checher'er)

AND NI !!! Tophat 10e

[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/grizzly_counter.php[/[url=http://www.katrinashome.com/] ][/url]


Last edited by Grizzly on Sat Apr 08, 2006 8:32 am; edited 1 time in total
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Michelle
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PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 7:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Shocked Shocked Laughing

Grizz, this is better than The Bold and the Beautiful!!



Eagerly awaiting the next instalment of "Grizz, Kat and the WHazel FH."
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Prince


Joined: 24 May 2002
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Location: Regrettably for you, I'm Upwind in Upstate N.Y.

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 9:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ain't nuthin' worse than an enraged Griz Shocked .

Ha ha, yoo Brits shir tawk funney, "hoze pype" Laughing .

#ni-2
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Grizzly
Prince
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PostPosted: Sat Apr 15, 2006 5:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

OK, Part Six: ----Pre Script, this is the boreing bit.

Standing on the WH front lawn was a “Delegation” of outraged citizens(*), comprising mostly of TNFH Hazel- all one of them, plus the “VOICE of reason” – henceforth now known as “Fizz” – ‘cuz of a short fuse. One other was there, dragooned by Hazel to “back her up”.
Big he was, played Rugby I ‘spect. Forgot his name now, even though he speaks and smiles at me to this day. He had moved in the week before and had no idea of WHs reputation.
I was assaulted by WH (understandable really in view of her perceived angst), and rescued by The Rugby Prop. Fizz’s FUSE went off.

Part 7

Later that evening, another resident from the street, a Fizz confidant and friend, came to see me and establish the facts. She was an ex-special Constable and wanted to be …scrupulously fair in my accertation(*) of events.

There was a knock (BANGING really) on our door. Ex-Special Constable (lets call her Wroth), cautioning us to stay still, opened the door. And was confronted by TWH.. Events ensued.

When we had picked up WROTH!! And forced door shut, it was now our turn to “establish” an “accertation”(*) ( scrupulously of course) of this new event.


I had a beer-it had been an eventful day.
Fizz had a shout, my beer was better.

At about 03:00 Hrs there was another “knock” on the door.
Grizz was asleepin and did not answer the door.
FIZZ did.
Two Constables and with a very polite demeanour(*) requested my company down at the local Cop Shop.for reasons –cough-unestablished.
I complied, but was told to change out of my dressing gown and slippers.
I kept my slippers on.

Part eight:

Desk Sergeant- “ Have you ever been arrested before?”
Grizz “Umm, yes-but I cannot tell you about it”
Desk Sergeant- “Why not?”
Grizz “It involved the misappropriation of an Anti-Tank missile in Germany ** years ago, and this information will not be released until 2020”

Hmmm:

Left, Right, Left, Right---Mind yer fingers “CLANG”


To be continued


Regds Grizz
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Oh Bugger Forgot again - or is it Oh Father Reboot again ?

Ps Grizz in his second childhood - but not his last !

Edihtor of the KoKC (excused spel;l checher'er)

AND NI !!! Tophat 10e

[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/grizzly_counter.php[/[url=http://www.katrinashome.com/] ][/url]
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Michelle
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PostPosted: Sat Apr 15, 2006 6:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

OMG, Grizz! That's a bloody classic. They came around to arrest you at 3 in the morning? Shocked
I can't wait to hear the next bit.

#ni-1
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Michelle
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PostPosted: Sun May 21, 2006 2:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear Grizz

Please send Kat to my house. I'm not scary enough. Confused Yelled at the neighbours last night for throwing rocks on our roof. Rolling Eyes Mother said "I'm not doing it." I said "It's your kids. Stop them." Kid said "You're throwing rocks at your own roof, and at our roof." My Girl child said, "How can we do that when we're inside." That's sort of how it went anyway with me telling them that if they did it one more time I'd call the coppers. My mother was yelling at the same time so I've left a bit out. lol
Idiots. The halfwits had been hitting rocks at their own roof earlier. I saw them while I was hanging clothes on the line. Rolling Eyes
So today I'm the effing sl*t next door. I know this because I've heard the kid yelling it a number of times.


p.s. Grizz, maybe Kat could start teaching "NFH Scaring". I'll sign up. #ni-1
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