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[CJ] Just give me the facts, m'am
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Fart in your gen direxion
I am the goatse.cx guy
Prince


Joined: 24 May 2002
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Location: Regrettably for you, I'm Upwind in Upstate N.Y.

PostPosted: Fri Jul 11, 2003 1:21 pm    Post subject: [CJ] Just give me the facts, m'am Reply with quote


Mosquito repellents don't repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito's sensors so they don't know you're there.

Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.

The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as substitute for blood plasma.


No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.

Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.

You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.

The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.

The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.

A Boeing 747s wingspan is longer than the Wright brother's first flight.

American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating One olive from each salad served in first-class.

Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.

The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.

Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.

Marilyn Monroe had six toes.

All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn't like being seen wearing them in public.

Walt Disney was afraid of mice.

Pearls melt in vinegar.

Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.

The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.

A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why.

The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.

Richard Millhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all the letters from the word "criminal." The second was William Jefferson Clinton.

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

Butterflies taste with their feet.

In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all of the world's nuclear weapons combined.

On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year.

On average people fear spiders more than they do death.

Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.

Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

It's physically impossible for you to lick your elbow.

The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

A snail can sleep for three years.

No word in the English language rhymes with "MONTH."

Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing. SCARY!!!

The electric chair was invented by a dentist.(EVEN MORE SCARY!!!)

All polar bears are left handed.

In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

"Go," is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall. Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.
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Mr. Snrub
Prince
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 11, 2003 3:34 pm    Post subject: Re: Just give me the facts, m'am Reply with quote

Fart in your gen direxion wrote:
...
Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.
...


This brings to mind what an expert on germs recommended (don't remember where I read it). Whenever you flush the toilet, an invisible plume of nastiness rises up from it and wanders about the room looking for a nice place to live. The expert suggested that you always put the lid down before flushing or, at the very least, to keep your toothbrush in a covered place. Now I always close the lid first, flush, and run from the room in terror.

Also, the expert concluded the nastiest place in the home may be the kitchen sink, since it comes into contact with all kinds of things and is touched often in a food preparation area. He recommended spraying it with diluted bleach to keep it germ-free.
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Sir Hamster of Elderberry
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 11, 2003 4:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

***OUCH*** #Crazy

Sad I think I dislocated my shoulder while trying to lick my elbow Sad
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Grizzly
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 12, 2003 3:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

-------------------------------------------------------------

No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Wrong , try it with an unwound loo roll - Grizz has won a bet on this !! Very Happy


Regds Grizzly
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Mr. Snrub
Prince
Prince


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 12, 2003 9:02 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why.


Quack! (listens)...?

Personally, I believe that this one may be quackers... Wink
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Lady DC
Princess DC
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Joined: 24 May 2002
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 12, 2003 9:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You just "quack" me up. Laughing Razz Confused
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Leon Day is coming. A most wonderful day to celebrate.



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Glitterd
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 12, 2003 12:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aahh, the sad state of my friends....I forwarded this list of facts to some friends and EVERY SINGLE ONE tried to lick their elbow! Rolling Eyes

Hmmm...I wonder why many people we can get to lick their elbows just by telling them they can't? Maybe we could turn this into a Distributed Computing Project?! Anyone know how to write code for one of these things?
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Mr. Snrub
Prince
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 12, 2003 1:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Glitterd wrote:
Aahh, the sad state of my friends....I forwarded this list of facts to some friends and EVERY SINGLE ONE tried to lick their elbow! Rolling Eyes
...


You're lucky. All of my friends tried to lick my elbow. I must have explained it wrong.
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Fart in your gen direxion
I am the goatse.cx guy
Prince


Joined: 24 May 2002
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Location: Regrettably for you, I'm Upwind in Upstate N.Y.

PostPosted: Sat Jul 12, 2003 3:22 pm    Post subject: Re: Just give me the facts, m'am Reply with quote

Mr. Snrub wrote:
Fart in your gen direxion wrote:
...
Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.
...


This brings to mind what an expert on germs recommended (don't remember where I read it). Whenever you flush the toilet, an invisible plume of nastiness rises up from it and wanders about the room looking for a nice place to live. The expert suggested that you always put the lid down before flushing or, at the very least, to keep your toothbrush in a covered place. Now I always close the lid first, flush, and run from the room in terror.



I'm happy if the toothbrush isnít melted and the shower curtain and towels arenít in flames !! Embarassed
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Lady DC
Princess DC
Prince


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2003 3:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mr. Snrub wrote:
Glitterd wrote:
Aahh, the sad state of my friends....I forwarded this list of facts to some friends and EVERY SINGLE ONE tried to lick their elbow! Rolling Eyes
...


You're lucky. All of my friends tried to lick my elbow. I must have explained it wrong.


You know I did not even think of trying to lick my elbow. I guess I just wondered why I would want to. Razz
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Goddess of Spankings.

Leon Day is coming. A most wonderful day to celebrate.



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Sir BaldyHead
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Joined: 16 Dec 2002
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2003 3:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ldy BB,

Please don't tempt us Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes

Ni!
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Lady DC
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Prince


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2003 7:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sir BaldyHead wrote:
Ldy BB,

Please don't tempt us Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes

Ni!


Who me? #Lil angel
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Leon Day is coming. A most wonderful day to celebrate.



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The Larch
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2003 8:38 am    Post subject: More useless factoids Reply with quote

The reason the effelump can't jump is cos it got 4 knees - the only mammal so equipped.

AND

There are more molecules in a teaspoon of Atlantic seawater than there are teaspoonfulls of water in the Atlantic ocean - Scary huh?
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Fart in your gen direxion
I am the goatse.cx guy
Prince


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Location: Regrettably for you, I'm Upwind in Upstate N.Y.

PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2003 9:53 am    Post subject: Re: More useless factoids Reply with quote

The Larch wrote:
The reason the effelump can't jump is cos it got 4 knees - the only mammal so equipped.


Ni ! Ni ! Ni ! Ni !! ---------------JUMP ! Very Happy
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KWSN None shall pass
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 02, 2003 10:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

*bump*

i like this thread....


but why can't elephantos jump?

what does knees have nething to do with it eh?

whut if my arms were cut off.. i could still jump...

NONE SHALL PASS.... and kick and bite...
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Fart in your gen direxion
I am the goatse.cx guy
Prince


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 02, 2003 1:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Elephants can't jump, but they can fly Surprised .

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Sir Hamster of Elderberry
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 02, 2003 1:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

KWSN None shall pass wrote:
*bump*

i like this thread....

...



Then perhaps it should be archived! Smile
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KWSN None shall pass
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 02, 2003 1:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sir Hamster of Elderberry wrote:
KWSN None shall pass wrote:
*bump*

i like this thread....

...



Then perhaps it should be archived! Smile


perhaps... Smile keeper of BROTHER MAYNARDS library???!!!!?!?!?! what did u end up choosin eh for da name?

FART: hey now... dumbo flew EVERY1 knows that elephants
1 hate mice
2 like peanuts
3 can fly

and i guess everybody but me:
4 can't jump

BUT I DON UNDERSTAND WHY?!?!?!
i think they can jump if they wanted to
_________________
I'm folding at my house (folding at home). Trying ever so diligently to get as menny points as millenium knight does in one week. WISH ME LUCK! Very Happy
[img]http://www.katrinashome.com/nsp_counter.php[/img]
Link to pics of farm goes HERE. (give me a few weeks k?)
someone help me stop with the ellipses PLEASE (plea for help)
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Fart in your gen direxion
I am the goatse.cx guy
Prince


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 02, 2003 1:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Elephants can swing, but they cannot jump Wink .

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Vesuvius
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 02, 2003 2:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Jump? No.
Launch? Yes.


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